Machine Love

thewordsofclayton:

sirtarantino:

a guy walked into the board room and said

"hi sweetheart if you could fix me up a coffee real quick im meeting with the regional reports manager in like five minutes, thanks darling"

and i just stared at him and coldly said

"i am the regional reports manager"

we are now twenty minutes into this board meeting and i dont think i’ve ever seen a man look so embarrassed and afraid in my whole life

Good

(Source: sofiajonze)

dean-bangs-cas-in-the-impala:

queen-of-fallen-angels:

jaxs-the-fallen-angel:

howling-rising-demon:

princess-dickhead:

delzdesigns:

Imagine having 2 dads, and then them divorcing and dating other men. Then you’d have 4 dads.

The amount of dad jokes…

"I’m hungry"
"Hi hungry, I’m dad."
"Hi dad, I’m dad too!"
"Hi dad too, I’m dad three."
"Hi dad three, I’m dad."

What have you done

image

Polni pizdec :D 

glitteringgimli:

krclara:

THRANDUIL

It’s official, I’m not going to survive BotFA

This post has sealed my fate 

It’s not the deaths that are gonna kill me, it’s fucking Thranduil’s beauty

lesushhh:

This will forever be adorable

(Source: best-of-memes)

cumbertrekky:

sherlockingmyhouse:

Simon Pegg and Amanda Abbington are having Cumberbatch dirty sex talk, please never stop.

Such sods
{

cumbertrekky:

sherlockingmyhouse:

Simon Pegg and Amanda Abbington are having Cumberbatch dirty sex talk, please never stop.

Such sods

coolben94:

Dear past self,

When u cut off ur hair mom wont be that mad and you dont have to run away.

From,
Ben (that’s you)

mihlayn:

new zealand’s finest
{

mihlayn:

new zealand’s finest

weloveshortvideos:

Short people be like

itseasytoremember:

wicked-is-hella:

itseasytoremember:

I wonder if there are Quidditch “street rules” matches where everyone’s taking liquid luck and all spells are fair game

People have died and gone missing due to Quidditch as it is what are you doing

THEY TURN UP IN A MONTH OR TWO IT’S FINE CALM DOWN

(Source: itsspookytoremember)

tastefullyoffensive:

Dogs Who Look Like Other Things [imgur]

Previously: Bears Doing Human Things

misandry-mermaid:

[source] {

misandry-mermaid:

[source]

honkschraders:

metal-thimble:

geekscoutcookies:

luvyourselfsomeesteem:

tidiness:

after reblogging this i opened up a card my great aunt gave me it has money in it

It could be a complete coincidence but I reblogged this yesterday and toda I fouund $40 at the fruit maket

Eh,why not

#this is dumb#but i’m desperate

when you got nothing you got nothing to lose
{

honkschraders:

metal-thimble:

geekscoutcookies:

luvyourselfsomeesteem:

tidiness:

after reblogging this i opened up a card my great aunt gave me it has money in it

It could be a complete coincidence but I reblogged this yesterday and toda I fouund $40 at the fruit maket

Eh,why not

when you got nothing you got nothing to lose

(Source: scarybilbo)

starkinglyhandsome:

dollygale:

captain-raptor:

best thing i learned working with and learning about kids: when they do shit like this, especially to something they themselves use and enjoy, leave it there for as long as possible. let them return to the fun thing over and over again so that it sinks in that the thing they did was wrong, they ruined something, and now they can’t have fun because of it and they should never do it again. it teaches them consequence of action and cautiousness.

i did this with a 3-year-old kid i babysat who filled his playstation with peanut butter before i got there, just every time he went back to it and asked why it’s not working, i opened it and pointed to the peanut butter stains and said “you did that” and he says “yeah”, “will it work like that?” “…no”, and when he got it and promised to never put anything but games into a game machine again, his parents bought another and he kept his promise. it works, even at that age.

this was a long and unnecessary rant but so many times i’ve seen parents IMMEDIATELY replace their kids’ toys/electronics that they destroy over and over again and i’m just like NO THEY’RE NOT LEARNING ANYTHING THAT WAY 

they also don’t learn from being thrown into fires

yeah but they’re quieter that way

(Source: ogtmoreno)

(Source: daily-feltson)

illuminate-your-soull:

I DIDNT EVEN OMG

(Source: rocket-wild)